Hello everybody, Well Christmas came and went pretty quickly, it has this annoying habit of speeding up every year, its like as people say that things come around faster the older you grow. Even if you want things to slow down, then they wont.
It kind of has this nasty habit of doing this to us, especially me. I feel that sometimes life is like a meteoroid hurtling through time and space faster then you can say jumping Jack has spazm attack.
As per usual Christmas gave me a much needed break, for solitude and pesimism to escape me, as my body had become weary with all the activities of 2010. I mean this on a serious note, the week before I went away to my parents I had made myself really mentally unstable, this was of course due to lack of sleep.
I was yoyoing in-between emotions, generally sparking full on pandemonium. from secound to secound my moods swang from overly hyperly positive and down right narcissistic pessimism. I think this partly may have something to do with kind of getting heart broken by another one of my crushes, I really should no better but hey I am me forever a dreamer.
Its like as if in my head I have what I call crystal chandelier fantasies, where I place sed person in my head, now I know I am not the only person that does this.
I know loads of people who fantasised about other people.
I know people have built entire carriers on the fact that people fantasise, just look at the world of celebrities and adult stars, most of them are sold on the premises of fantasy.
Its perennial their grass is greener then mine state of mentality, that we tend to eye upon a lot of people, with various kind of band wagons which they are paraded in front of us. When in truth they are probably about the same in greenness.
I know I have been waffling on for quite a bit for the last little while about absolute nonsense, but this is how my mind works, its a many random thing.
So getting back on my original subject, my Christmas. Went down to my parents in Plymouth. Yes, I fled these leafy greens of Bristol to the Leafy Plymouth, or leaky Plymouth as it is really out on the sea front.
As per usual I turned up at my parents in my impressive state, head hanging on a 45 degree angle, eyes bleeding from lack of sleep and body shaking. These are some of the side effects I tend to suffer, when my body pays me back for the past year.
But boy I was in an emotional mess, my parents as per usual just wrote off as me being one of those kind of states, that they usually pick me up in. I mean I love my folks to bits they have helped me out so many times its un believable.
My parents are the kind of people who also really know how to build a community spirit where ever they are, they have taught me many valuable lessons, even if they do come across to some people as being a bit odd. For instance not many people would have a bonfire out in the snow, but hell yes my parents and I did and it was amazing.
So they treated me royally especially with my Sister not being around, to be honest I do get pretty spoilt. They got me an ipod shuffle for my main present with which it is currently loaded with lots of Ian Dury and Iggy Pop stuff.
I have tend to visualise the bands playing the songs, right in-front of my eyes when ever I hear them on record, I can see the colours and the patterns that the melodies or the guitar noise can make.
I also realise that different sounds have different effects on me, for instance listening to What A Waist by Ian Dury put me in a positive mood because not only is it a great song by one of England's greatest song writers but you can sense that his parents saw him as a bit of disappointment and the struggles with life, it puts me in a positive mood listening to his punk style joy de vie.
Where as Raw Power by the Stooges really turns me on in a kind of sexual way, because there are some guitar sounds which have an automatic turn on device to me. If there are any girls out there reading this that wanted to lure me into their place with music then give me Igg Pop and the Stooges b or MC5 because the sound of guitar feedback makes me go wild. I admitedly will probably start drawling which aint too attractive
You probably didn't want to read that last paragraph, I wouldn't blame you if you were throwing up in slop bucket on reading it. Its a probably a bit of a sick thought that may haunt quite a few of you out there.
Walking around listening to my ipod did remind me how much I get sucked into the sounds, I quite often find myself pretending to be the front man of which ever artist is blaring in my ears. I have tendencies to get really carried away, even ever now and the breaking into little dance moves.
Its fair to say I got quite a few weird stares from people, i even had one guy point at me 'Hey mate there's Widow Twankie' as I strutted my stuff past him on the Plymouth High st.
Around Christmas time I found out that I tend to turn into a demented 12 yr old whos been locked in a sweetie shop, especially if there are any fair ground rides about. You see I am attracted to things which flash bright colours and are fast moving in spinning actions.
When ever I see fair ground rides, its fair to say that my attention focus is like dog with squirrel, i could be having a deep conversation with someone, and then all of a sudden must stair at big swing arm thing with red and green lights, ooow it goes really high up and down, spin spin spin, oooow.
You probably think I am completely stoned, but I reassure you this is my perfectly normal behaviour, yes really acting my mental age in its full swing, and of course I must go on the rides even if they make me chunder a pale shade of blue.
This I know is all completely over the top and stupid, but boy aint it fun, even though I am actually sitting hear, thinking what will become of me in 2011, who knows, there are one or two things I would like to see happen, It would be nice to find someone I can share special experiences with, ie like a girlfriend and also be paid to do some of the stuff I do.
But what ever happens I wish everyone out there a successful 2011